This is never going to get better .....

In my planning I would call in sick just before my operation.

That's just what I did. Judgement day has dawned, I can't avoid it any more. 

My employer knows that this will last a few months.


I now enter a really tough time. But I don't realise it at the time.

After the operation stay at home for one, perhaps two months. Then go back to work.


That didn't happen…

Two operatios aren't enough


My doctor had explained to me that I would have two operations.

The first operation would be to remove 2 infected axillary glands. After that there would be a recovery period.

Then a breast amputation.

All the tissue was examined in the lab to determined the result of the treatment.


The breast was clean, but there were alas still cancer cells in the glands.

So I get 15 radiotherapy sessions plus medication to suppress the hormonal breast cancer.

I was dreading it.


I googled it of course. If I can believe what Google tells me, this medication has quite a lot of drawbacks.

After weighing up the advantages and disadvantages I decided to take the medication.

In the end you look at the chances. The chance to live longer outweighs the fear.

I'm starting on a 10-year challenge with tamoxifen.


Getting on with my life?


I thought that I'd be able to get on with my life as soon as possible.

I was really mistaken. I really underestimated it.


The chemotherapy, operations and radiotherapy treatment were over, but now the problems really started.

Strange, because everybody thinks that you're cured. Everything's over, you're still alive, you look good, so you must better.


But nobody knows that I'm in pain, a lot of pain. The removal of the axillary glands causes a lot of discomfort.

I suffer from edemain my armpit and have a lot of pain in my joints and bones. A gift from the chemotherapy.

Haren, wenkbrauwen en wimpers groeien veel te langzaam.

Ik heb neuropathy in my toes and my nails keep breaking.


For the first time I think to myself: "This is never going to get better...'


Read more of  Hülya' s story: Every day is a new challenge